Just the way it is.

I haven't written lately and it's not due to some new existential crisis or lack of material. Just plain ol writers block. We slipped into the realm of our normalcy with a sense of fluidity and ease. As much as there is chaos at this house it's where I'm calling home and I'm glad to be back here. My things are neatly put away where they belong. My tea is where it belongs. My blankets and pillows put in just the right spot. My boots have their place next to the armoire. I can traipse to my bathroom half naked and not have to worry too much about anyone seeing me...unless I hear a pitter patter...which happens more frequently than not. These are the new comforts of my home. The rhythmic pace at which my life moves. I like things just so. 

There isn't any other simpler happiness for me than the act of hanging pictures on my wall. I love standing back and just sighing. Beaming to see them happily displayed. The OCD agony of making sure everything is balanced and in line with it's inanimate chi. I strung two pieces of ribbon, stuck in the wall with thumb tacks and hung the beaming faces of my friends with miniature clothes pin. Revolving art for under $8. Even not looking at it but knowing it's there makes me feel right in the world. 

The past week was a blur of really long nights and countless hours driving to and fro. I volunteered at Bean's schools field trip to the Jumping place again. Less jumping for me. I left it for the wee ones. I did finally have some nice adult conversation with the other parents. Oh how I miss it.


I spent my Christmas money spending far more than usual on wool socks and a subscription to Time. J says it's worthless. I just like having something to read and feel semi connected to the world. 


Oh. We semi have our kitchen back. I distinctly remember being poo pooed about using the kitchen once the appliances were in. However, D went into a tornado frenzy and immediately started putting things away. Just the way she wanted them. The christening meal was a frozen pizza.I haven't fully used the new capabilities of our kitchen. I need to make a run to the store and get my essentials. Can't wait for a stir fry, vegan cookies, taco salads and smoothies. Ohhhh smoothies. How I have longed for you. You precious beginning to my day. You glass of wonderfulness. 

Other news. My application is completed. I'm just waiting on one more reference to come in. Then it's off. Off to wait for three months. See note below for my daily affirmations. I've been overly confident about getting something, knowing I'm fully credentialed, spending thousands in credit card debt to get it only to be rejected. So, I'm bracing myself for the disappointment. That's why the pear invented plan B. Get TEFL certified. See the world and teach. Win win I suppose. What happens happens. 

Uhm this weekend. My sloth like existence. I checked almost everything off my list. Just need to sanitize the bathroom. Gross. The only redeeming factor about living with my jerk face ex (I'm not bitter, promise) was that I had someone I could woo into scrubbing the toilet. Having fresh baked cookies as an incentive probably helped too.

 Bear passed her karate white belt test and is now a proud high kicking yellow belt. This just means more work for me, longer nights, much much longer nights. Ugh. 

We have been dumped upon by a lot of snow. It was up to the dogs nose there was so much. Up way past my shins nearing my knees in parts of the yard. We, and by that I mean D, braved the snow to take the girls to the Nikiski pool. I was suppose to take Bean yesterday, but today worked out loads better for all parties involved. It was rather expensive to go in given that it was a community place. Let me just tell you that I HATE public bathroom floors. UGghghgh. Shivers. Seriously gross. Public pools filled with cess piles of hair and detritus other bits, bleck. All in the name of fun with the kids. The pools was split up into different areas, such as the kid zone with a spewing mushroom, the older kid hang out, lap lanes, diving board and water slide. I helped D watch and wrangle kids. Thankfully there was hardly anyone there. The frosty white trees outside were a funny comparison to the warm sticky aroma inside. Changing in the locker room and trying to retain some modicum of decency was fun. Rolls eyes. Here you are trying not to moon your boss while having a small bath towel and being 12 inches apart. Needless to say I was successful in not doing that. 

Back home my Bean and I snuggled up and I taught her some sight words which she got a total kick out of. We all gathered together and ate as a family which felt nice. 

Monday monday monday......