Cuisine or lack there of...

So I didn't think I was going to have much to write to you about today. What with yesterday's grand escapades on frightening moments in the mountains. Then it hit me square in the stomach. You see, if I haven't already beat  you over the head with it already, we don't really have a kitchen currently. No big deal right? WRONG. Your whole freaking life centers around the kitchen/living/dinning room area. So yay! You get to eat out more than you care to. Whoopity wrong. Have you been to a small Alaskan town in the middle of the winter? Have you added being a semi vegan to that mix? What a freaking nightmare. Let me set this up for you. Imagine..imagine your average run of the mill restaurant.. for those of you back home...take Pablo's for example..now bring that down about 3 notches and spread it across the entire town until it's populated every single restaurant. Have I made myself clear enough  yet? THERE IS NO GOOD FOOD HERE. You better believe that the first going out meal I have back home is  Thai ginger tofu. I am DYING. This veg foodie is dying. 

(The above picture is suppose to elicit the warm feeling of a delicious meal that I wish I was enjoying...) 

The final bits of tile are being put in today so we've been quarantined to our rooms. Well seeing as we very well couldn't go home and eat...we had to eat out bloody again. (I've been watching British humor...)

Where again...the dang Mexican restaurant. AGAIN. My stomach is not happy with me. My calorie watching is not happy with me. If I was kissing my imaginary boyfriend he wouldn't be happy with me. 

I just wanted a stinking burrito. Well OK no I didn't want a burrito that smelled...just one that doesn't involve sauteed onions and peppers and other various bits of gross. Ugh. I could get shivers just thinking about it. 

You never realize how much food and home life are essential to you until it's gone I suppose. I think modern cuisine has stressed us all out. Whatever happened to simple home made casseroles and family meals. All we see on TV are cooks whipping up dinner like it's nobodies business. Well staring at a pantry of food can be daunting. Once we get our normal kitchen back I'm determined to find some normalcy in my eating. And so help me the pear if I ever eat out at the Mexican restaurant EVER AGAIN. 

I'm in a cheery mood. Honest. This food situation is just depressing. There that's all I have to say about that. Food for thought. :P

Knowing my limits...

Remember that post from yesterday? (Well if not go read it...or look at the pretty pictures.) Well I put that practice of knowing thine self to work today. I'm super duper awesome at making excuses. I should probably be crowned the queen of them or something. This is relevant I promise....

There's a website called meetup.com where people of like mind and interest get together to do like minded interesting things. I've done it some back home and thought what better way to meet people out here in my new land. Well, one thing after another came up, babysitting the girls, out of town, sinus sick, my pjs sounded way better, etc,...I never went.

Well I decided that this Sunday despite not feeling one hundred percent that I was going to be brave and venture outside of my normal little shell and do the Hidden Creek Snowshoe. I spent most of Saturday night rounding up gear. Half of it borrowed, new, used or blue.

This morning I stalled in bed for as long as possible..the butterflies tickling my insides and the little voices of comfort screaming to stay in where it was warm. (Actually no it wasn't warm....Dr. J forgot to turn the gas back on last night so there was no heat...needless to say I was wearing long underwear and was under 5 piles of blankets)

After getting all bundled up I checked in with Dr. J to let him know where I was going and hit the road. This group of people were really kind. I told them I was new and had ZERO idea where I was going so they offered to meet me at the local grocery store and give me a ride over to the trail head. Almost everyone was significantly older than I am but all very mature and very Alaskan.

Let me interrupt this to say that both the thermostat and the weather report were indicating it was at least 5 below zero in town.

OK so we shuffled cars around and drove up to Sterling to start our trek. We strapped on our snow shoes, watched our water bottles instantly freeze and chased dogs around the parking lot.

It was up the trail we began. I was told this was suppose to be a rather flat hike. Well going upwards isn't considered flat in my book.

The views were just stunning however, surrounded by the mountains, a frozen river and snow covered trees. It was amazing.

I could feel my lungs struggling to breathe so I paused and took two big puffs on my inhaler and tried desperately to get a full breath of air in. By the time we climbed to a summit and took in the scenery my lungs were operating at the size of a grape. I know I talk to my girls about perseverance all the time...this was not the time nor place. I turned to one of the ladies behind me and informed her I could go no further. I felt my head getting light, my lungs squeezing every little bit of air possible. There was just no way I was going to make it for another 3 hours. My legs were strong and willing to go on but my lungs just wouldn't listen.

Tears began to roll down my cheeks and froze on my nose. I felt so horrible for being the new person who was already ruining it for them. Two of the ladies I'd been hiking with reassured me that it was not an issue at all. I told them to go on with out me and that I would figure out a way to get home. They instantly poo pooed me and said they were coming down with me to make sure I was safe. I was never more grateful. One of the ladies even gave me her car keys so I could drive down the road.

I had jut met these people not more than two hours ago.

I texted my friend B but because of poor/no reception the only text that went out was, "I had an asthma attack can you meet me at the pull of3."

I didn't realize that my other texts explaining that I was OK didn't make it to her.

So as I'm driving down the road I get a call from a 911 operator. "Mam are you OK?"

Me: "Uhm...oh yes I'm fine."

The lady went on to ask me if I was going to the hospital (I wasn't), if I was safe (I was), if I'd taken my inhaler (I had). Then I told her I don't like talking and driving and that I was fine thank you.

I called my friend B and apologized profusely for scarring her, she said she had thoughts about me being passed out in the mountains alone. I was never so grateful to her for being there to come pick me up and being so concerned about a friend she'd only just come to know.

We ended up hanging out and laughing about our near death scare. I'd forgotten what it was like to have a night with a girlfriend. She's another au-pair here in town. She though lives in a little cabin that's really more of a studio apartment separate from her family's main house. She made pasta and I cooked up my PB chocolate chip cookies.

Side note....we're getting dinner together and all of sudden this giant-ass moose lumbers on by like nobody's business. This thing was gigantic and it was right outside the window!

After watching a movie she drove me back home where I was grateful to be.

Only drama like this in Alaska I tell you. Either that or in my life! So there you have it...I've discovered I'm neither a.) in shape enough and b.) not going to hike in minus anything weather since I'm an asthmatic. I will leave hiking to warmer weather and less strenuous conditions thank you so very much.

Serenity

Here's the musing I promised you yesterday....


In college I was the kid that stayed home on Friday nights and listened to opera and pieced together puzzles. That was my serenity. Or maybe I just wasn't cool enough to you know go out and do stuff...whatever stuff is that college kids do. I had gone through a pretty tough "loss" in my life and was coping and finding my inner happiness in the only way I knew how. 

So as I've kind of hinted I haven't dated much, one significant relationship with the person I've now deemed big fat jerk face. It was a pretty intense relationship. When it all came crashing down I took it pretty hard even though I knew that it was coming for a long time. I was too scared to let it go. Too insecure to admit that I wasn't happy. After it all ended I hated when people would tell me to "go find myself." What in the hell does that mean. Seriously. After modeling myself, my attitudes, my beliefs, my interests and passions after someone for the past 2.5 years I had lost the me which had become a we . People would tell me a few weeks after the near constant sobbing had ended, that I was happier. I started thinking to myself, am I really happy? Was I not happy then? I sure felt happiness. Or what I thought was happiness. 

Honestly, you can't just snap your fingers and find yourself. It doesn't happen over night, in a day, a week or even a year. It's a road that never is quite ending. 

I remember sitting down one day with a giant box of markers and a sheet of paper and started writing down all the things that I loved doing and all the qualities that I felt made up my character. It was empowering seeing those all down on paper. Slowly the picture of who, Jillian, is as a person was coming into focus. Everyday is a discovery of this being, of who this bundle of molecules is. 

Being here in Alaska, being so far away from my home and my family has forced me to be the most introspective I've ever been.

I am now at peace with the person that I am. I always thought it was corny when people said that they knew what loving themselves was. For the first time in my life I can look in the mirror and love the person staring back.

One of the things I decided when I came out here was that this was going to be my year of "rest". Yes I know my job keeps me busy. I mean rest in the sense that I'm not going to worry that I spent an entire weekend in my pajamas lounging about. I've been running at a million miles an hour for goodness knows how long. When else am I going to have a year of being able to do all things I've always wanted to but never could find the time. This is the year of my serenity. 

Serenity came today in the form of taking a walk on the beach. A beach that is right outside my back door. I bundled up, ignored the forecast of minus 8 degrees outside, strapped on my snow shoes and headed out. 

The hard packed snow crunched beneath my feet as I hurdled glaciers that had formed on the once sandy shores. I took in deep cool breaths of mountain air and let the wind nip at my cheeks. The sun was low over the mountains. The air was still. A small white bird danced in and out of the tall grass poking up under piles of snow. The water swirled under the mist that was floating in the air. 

The camera was in and out of it's protective shell, trying in earnest to capture the beauty of the scene around me. I bravely descended over piles of snow, frozen bits of water and large cracks that had formed. All the while making sure I had a route back up on the "mainland". I sat down on the frozen tundra and and was in awe of the scene in front of me. This was my new serenity. 

The little voice inside my head that keeps this blog going was rambling at a million miles an hour. Ever since moving here the creative side that has been buried for so long as finally had a place to spew all of it's words and musings and other bits. It's as though this valve has turned on and the gush of words that has come out doesn't seem to have an off switch. 

Take a moment to find the things in your life that give you peace and serenity. What makes you feel at one with yourself? Where does that creative side that lives in all of us burst forth in great rhapsody? You don't have to move 3,000 miles away to find it. I'm sure you can locate it somewhere. When you do, it's the most amazing feeling. 

It's a feeling that wraps you up in it's warm embrace and tells you that you are home. It's sticking your hands in a bowl of cookie dough. It's snuggling up close with your kids. It's drawing lines on a canvas. Or sipping a warm cup of tea while taking the time to admire the sunset. 

Finding serenity is finding peace within ourselves. 

Evil glitter and sad turkeys.

This was suppose to be a joint re-telling/existential musing...only I forgot what I was going to muse about. So apparently that's going to have to wait until tomorrow. That and the fact that I'm dying inside. I'm dying because a.) I'd like to go upstairs and bake my "I'm craving chocolate and need it now" brownies but can't because well I don't want to bother the family and b.) I'm counting my calories and it would SO not look good on my Sparkpeople page. Seriously people...Alaska is making me huge. The hugest I've ever been. I'm just gonna pretend it's muscle from all the kid lifting and my attempts to run...ahaha...no wait quickly walk on a treadmill. Yes, let's go with that. Tracking calories is exhausting.

OK so..I was not in the mood to be in the house at all today. The dog was whining like crazy from being "locked" up while the tile is being laid. I mean this dogs whimpers and screams as though we were torturing the darn thing. The whole house is in disarray and it's hard being here. So I did my very best to spend the least amount of time here and kill the void of space by keeping busy in a smallish rural Alaskan town.

I had another visit with the ART specialist. I'm telling you that thirty minutes of torture was worth every painful minute. Every single jabbing of thumb in sweaty armpit moment. I haven't been able to turn on the radio or wash my hair or put on my shirt without wanting to cry. When I got in my car I pushed the music on and didn't wince once. Now granted my rotator-cuff is still stuck. But my pulled chest muscle is feeling..well no I'm not feeling anything at all. To go from having this feeling in your chest like a bear has sunk it's claws in you to having to deal with just a stuck shoulder...it's night and day. Now granted I could pull it again...but enjoying this day off from near constant pain...it's amazing. I could cry tears of joy.

Bean has been asking nearly non-stop all week to go to the pet store. I have no idea why she enjoys it so much. All we do it aimlessly wander around. Well she was genuinely surprised when we pulled into the parking lot and was grinning from ear to ear. She bounced down the aisles and expertly navigated the rows and rows of fish tanks. The funniest part was at the lizard cage where she kept making growling noises and curled her fingers into claws so she could communicate with the poor confused creature.

Even though we didn't have the most successful morning I still let the girls go to the art studio. The little strip mall is set waaay back off the road and you have to know what you're looking for otherwise you'd miss it in a blink of an eye.Most of the mall is closed out and for rent but the art and dance studios are still there. A young girl greeted us and got the girls started on projects. They painted masks, made Valentines wreaths, decorated cards for their friends birthdays and painted little boxes. They also glitterfied EVERYTHING. Whomever invented glitter should be dismembered. That stuff is EVIL. I'm still finding bits in the oddest of places.

Back home for a non-descript evening of trying to keep the girls entertained in a house under construction.

Thank the pear tomorrow is Saturday...thank you thank you thank you.

By the way...we and I mean the family has been raising chickens...well that and a turkey. So one of the chickens died some time between yesterday and this morning. Well as I was leaving the turkey who is friends with all the chickens, had his head bowed over this now dead bird. It was so sad. He looked so morose and distraught that his friend had died. I wanted to give him a giant turkey hug. But then I remembered that he bit me last week and changed my mind.

Rest in peace golden chicken...rest knowing you will not be turned into a Mcnugget.

Skiing in -3

OK so it wasn't really minus three it just makes me sounds tougher than I really am. :) It was more like 4 degrees above zero. And it was gorgeous. Little drops of snowflakes frosting the bits of hair that stuck out and dancing on my nose. Tall evergreens rose up on either side and were covered with neat and tidy piles of fluffy white snow. I was grateful that I met B at the gas station for the ride to the trail. The sign was matted with snow and the road in was only visible to a trained eye. It was a still and quiet morning. No moose in sight. No other skier zooming past. Just a grey sky and twinkling snowflakes. Most of the beginning was spent leaning on B for help getting my skis clipped onto my boots.

As the two novices pushed and gripped the fresh snow we both felt like the blind leading the blind. Neither of us having had much experience out on the trails before let alone on skis. Thankfully B had come out on Tuesday and knew the trail as well as anyone having done it once before could. The terrain proved to be rather mild in nature with only two "daunting" hills. I felt the butterflies in my stomach start to flutter. I yelled down to B who had just taken a plunge: "this is worse than going on a roller coaster, I'd much rather NOT be in control right about now."

Well...

I fell flat on my arse. I can' remember if it was a graceful swan dive or a full throttle bomb explosion.

Either way I was OK looking like yup..a goon ball.

There was a point of no return on that hill where mother nature, my ability to coordinate two wooden sticks, stay in the grooves all came colliding together and there I was on my arse.

After recovering from that tumultuous kerfluflle we glided onward through soft snowy wonderland.

I kept thinking to myself, "how amazing is it that it's 10:00 a.m. on a Thursday and here I am out cross country skiing and not sitting behind a desk?"

OK I'm going to end this on a positive note.

I'm an asthmatic. I don't fare well moving. Let alone moving while attached to wooden poles in Alaska cold.

That's not the positive note...in case you were wondering.

I made it through that loop twice. With very little pausing.

I also went down that darn hill again....

and didn't crash. It was one of those goofy super proud moments of my life.

I cheated and veered off the tracks and just let mother nature do her thang and I made it down without tumbling like a weed.

It was amazing.

Beauty and the Beast

I can't really remember where I left off. It's been such a tumultuous, hectic and generally busy couple of days. Friday D and I ran the girls around and then I took her to work. We picked up the girls from school and hit the road for Anchorage for a weekend at their NanNan's. It was the much anticipated weekend of Beauty and the Beast. I feel as though we've been talking about it for months now and it was suddenly upon us. The drive in wasn't bad and I got to see the sunset behind the mountains whose names I always forget. The girls kept asking the classic are we there yet while D and I enjoyed a nice adult conversation. Although you have to be careful what you say in front of kids whom you think aren't paying attention because they'll bring up the most minute detail the following day.

I don't think I slept at all on Friday night, between being sumo wrestled by the smelly twenty pound cat, the fact that I forgot my sleeping mask or that the couch is in the middle of the center of the house (redundant I know) and/or that their Nan Nan gets up suuuuper early.

We got the girls all dolled up in their fanciest dresses and hit the road for downtown. I hadn't seen much of Anchorage except for a few large shopping malls and of course Costco. The part of downtown I saw resembled much of the other nondescript centers that I've seen. All the same in their large buildings and criss-crossing streets.

We went to the performing arts center to see a live production of the musical Beauty and the Beast. All the little girls there were dressed up in their finest clothes or costumes from their dress up chests. The show wasn't the best production that I have ever seen but I always enjoy a live production. 90% of the songs were recognizable from the Disney classic movie and were well sung. Gaston looked a little odd and out of place but the rest of the cast was well suited to the show. There were some neat puppetry in the wolf attack scene and good choreography in the feast scene. The girls were entranced and sat patiently through the two and half hour production.

We had dinner at the local favorite Red Robin. I would have preferred somewhere local but I guess just like back home you settle for whats convenient and easy for everyone. I substituted a vegan burger in my wrap and didn't think twice about it. Then all of a sudden the manager comes out and asks who the vegan at the table is. I sheepishly raised my hand. He went on to tell me all the animal ingredients in my food and offered to sub them out. I've never in my entire veggie life had some one, let alone from a chain, offer food information. It was amazing, unlike my wrap.

Sunday D and I did the obligatory shopping trip to Costco and had to finagle it all into our already stuffed car. We're still having to do laundry at any one's house who will allow us. It makes packing the small SUV quite a challenge when you have four peoples dirty clothes that have piled up over 2 weeks. Plus add in Costco sized groceries and two car seats. You do the math.

The drive home was quite the contrast to the rather clear roads of Friday. There was zero visibility with blowing winds winding through mountains. D was white knuckled the entire way. We finally pulled into the gas station in Girdwood and called a friend to see if we could find some respite. Well we ended up "crashing" their small family birthday dinner. The weather report called for blowing gusting winds, zero visibility, icy roads and snow accumulation. Basically, they shut down the road. We were snowed in. Thankfully we were staying at one of D's close friends ski cabins.

In the past three months I have slept at more strangers houses than I have in the entire last year.  

Two of the lady's sons were in town to ski and the younger one was here for his birthday. They were quite the hoot and the girls had a blast with their two much older play mates. They served roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. I had roast potatoes and carrots.I cheated and had a delicious slice of Boston Creme Pie.

Since beds were in short order, I had the privilege of sleeping with Bear. It was another rough night of sleep. She spread out full eagle and I was left with a sliver of bed. Every time I tried to move her she'd go right back where she came from, sharp untrimmed toe nails and all. Did I mention the heat also went out? Did I also forget to mention I was awoken at 6:30 a.m.?

The drive home was much clearer and the roads were ten times better, for Alaska standards. We stopped for breakfast at the local bakery. Holy cow rip off city. D and I ate the stalest overpriced muffins of our lives. I'm a fan of breakfast pastries but I could hardly finish more than two bites and sip on the overly sweet apple cider.

Finally back home in Kenai I fed the girls lunch and sent them outside to shake off their cabin fever. Off to karate and crashing to bed.

We were back in the full thick of things yesterday:

Drop the girls off at school. Come home work out, clean the kitchen, eat, write, head out. Pick up Bean at school. Take Bean to a play date. Kill time at the coffee shop. Chat with a stranger about my "bubble wrap" skirt and pizza back home. Do some awesome people watching, including a lady going through some social crisis. Pick up Bean. Take Bean to the dentist. Meet D at the dentist. Run to pick up Bear early. Read some awesome parental excuses for their children being late on the sign out list. (Examples, busy morning, overslept, too tired.) Take Bear to the dentist. Take girls out to dinner. Eat burgers at the Mexican restaurant. Run to the grocery to get "pooping" fruit. (AKA prunes). Race to the ski trails. Look like an inverted pretzel trying to fully clothe two kids in the back of the car in full on snow suits. Fingers freeze getting Bear to her coach. Beans toes freeze. Drive Bean home who falls asleep. Clean up and unpack and wait for parents to come home.

Yes I was about to cry I was so exhausted.

A less busy day today. Amen.

Queen Bess

The car  has been officially christened...I told the girls one freezing morning that our car needed a name. I told em it should be Bess and I received no complaints...except Bean decided she needed to be royalty. So she calls her Queen Bess. I figured that we spend so much time in the car that we needed to give her a proper name. She is a part of the family y'know. Man on these cold mornings she sputters trying to start up and the radio screen really lags. The girls were funny, Bear runs up to me and says, "Jill a bird pooped on Bess! She's all dirty now, we have to take her to car-wash RIGHT AWAY." Then Bean tells me in the car later, "Jill, Bess goes suuuuper fast, doesn't she?"  They've gotten so into it, it's adorable. 

Since we've gotten our kitchen semi-back I'm back into cooking and baking again, man does it feel nice. There is the perfect window of time between picking up Bean and picking up Bear that I can get all the dinner fixings and kitchen chores done. Bean loves playing with the carpenters kids when they come over, so that and play dough kept her entertained for a while. I made cheesy mac for the girls...well I didn't realize that the shredded cheese had spices in it...so they didn't eat it. I apparently failed again on dinner. OH..but I did cook chicken...for the first time in I dunno...2 years? Apparently it turned out well. Not too shabby for a semi vegan. 

Since the weather has been so cold Bear's ski lessons were cancelled again today. Everyday we pass the Kenai visitors center and I've always wanted to go in and check it out. So y'know what? Today we did. I figured we had nothing else to do except go on an adventure. I literally had to drag the girls out they enjoyed it so much! Right in the front was the gift shop and they wanted more than anything to buy something, but I convinced them otherwise. There was large open  space with art hanging on the walls and a smaller back room that housed various exhibits. It wasn't organized the best and most of the exhibits were under construction. However, the artifacts that they did have were a neat glimpse into life homesteading in Alaska. I love love love old timey tins and they had quite the nice collection. I had to pretend that I knew what everything was and sound smart for the girls every time they asked me what something was. You get good at fudging details when you're a nanny. Yes of course they only wore slippers back in the old days, yup that's a tooth from a momma bear, no I don't know why that's here...no.. museums are for our eyes and not our hands...and on it goes.:)

There was a little model of the "famous" church here in Kenai and the girls were stunned that there was a larger scale version just around the corner. In old town Kenai there are some neat historical buildings and access to the water. Well the sun was just starting to set so I took the girls to climb up on the snow banks and look out on the water and watch the sunset. I was kind of distracted making sure they didn't fall so my photography isn't the best. We came home and D and J both came home earlier than expected, so we enjoyed dinner as a family together.

I'll close this with the shots from today. I know they aren't my best work...meh. Always another day. Holy hec tomorrow is Friday...

Goon Ball

Holy tamole..I don't even know where my day went...I didn't do a darn thing and poof there it went...just like that.  I made a total goon ball out of myself this morning. I thought I heard the regular pitter patter of feet upstairs that signals the parents leaving...so I said hello to the carpenters wife....knocked on the kids door...they weren't there..so I went to check in the parents room...

I knocked a little bit...peeked open the door and turned the lights on ....and there's the whole family asleep in bed. I felt like such a flpn goon ball. So I scurried out. Now the six year old comes in and starts yelling at me to get her clothes and I'm flustered because I just woke up sick parents and the laundry hasn't been put away so I can't find anything and I'm clothing challenged, now in walks the four year old who is also yelling to hand her clothes. It was not a good start to my day.

I later talked to D and apologized profusely. She assured me it was fine and that I had no way of knowing. I still felt like a piece of doggie poo though. 

Speaking of doggie poo...since the remodel we've had an infestation of mice upstairs. Well I was in my room today doing what ever it was I was doing and thought I saw something dart across my field of vision. I chalked it up to staring at the screen for too long and kept going. Well then I start hearing this rustle. Now I'm getting concerned. There it is again. So I get all brave and go look under my bed and sure enough I saw it again, this flash. A freaking mouse under my freaking bed. So I ran to go get the girls Dad. He laid a bait under my bed and showed me the dead mouse from their room. UGHGHGHG. 

I'm not going to sleep well tonight. The darn thing still hasn't been caught. I'm either gonna be listening  for this thing to be running under my bed or the inevitable snap of the trap. Great and I haven't slept well in days because of this cold.

Did I mention it was -22 this morning?

OH..I did bake today. Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.. from the new cookbook that I bought. Apparently it's the Vegan bible of cooking. Delicious.

(he was no help in catching the mouse btw)

Quote of the day from my awesome tacos brother "I'm gonna Skype shank you with my lord of the rings knife."

(I almost peed my pants...it was epic..not the peeing part...oh never mind..)

Holy Cold Batman!

Today felt like one of those days that your brain is constantly zooming around trying to remember everything. I mean my phone today informed me that "I" missed my alarm. Excuse me. I was awake and it never went off. That's how my day started. Not to mention that every breathing orifice in my body was currently serving as a lodging place for mucus. I think I woke up at least 5 times last night fighting to breathe. Stupid, stupid stupid cold. 


Oh cold you ask? Well my friends I know I keep saying I'm an Alaskan...but man was I ferociously shown otherwise. In the short span of the walk from my front door to my car...maybe 15 paces...my fingers went ice cold numb. I was wearing gloves. When I checked the weather later that day....-21. NEGATIVE TWENTY ONE PEOPLE. Holy Toledo is that cold. Your lungs burn, your fingers form into claws and the hair you haven't shaved on your legs stand to attention military style. I was wearing long undies. BRRRR.


I was trying to get pictures uploaded, pack bags, drag slugs out of bed, answer e-mails, edit photos, make breakfast, calm the dog down, sort my laundry and drag a car seat back out into the car. It was a rough morning. It took my four year old 45 minutes to eat a piece of toast and drink some juice. Needless to say her hair went up in a bun and I barely brushed it. We were behind by ten minutes. I don't like being behind...at all. 


I couldn't get my fingers to warm up until I finally dropped Bean off at school 30 minutes later. They hurt they were so cold. 


Well we still don't have a laundry machine so it's to the laundromat I went this morning. I despise and loathe the laundromat. A LOT. It always feels so germy to me and I want nothing more than to just run away.


 I had to call the pool the verify swim lessons, forgot my own phone number, had to call back and talk to the same ditsy person again. 


Of a side note...all the times I've been tot he laundromat the majority of the people there are men in their sixties reading newspapers. It's odd. 


I actually managed to not wander aimlessly at the grocery store today. Yay me. I got what I needed and headed out. Well now I had not enough time to go home and too much time to kill in town. This is always quite the conundrum for me. 


All the quaint little stores I wanted to check out were closed so I headed back to my usual spot for my cup of tea. I switched things up and treated my self to a chocolate coconut bar. It's a good place to eavesdrop on conversation and burn your tongue on delicious tea. 


The baristas were all in a fuss about the latest gossip of stolen oats at the horse keeping place (?). Who stole the oats? Like seriously, I pay for those oats and like if they're going to eat them then like I'm going to start using theirs. Like if it gets to minus 20 five then Starbright is fine but if like it gets to minus 23 then she's not. You need to like you know like check if like shes shivering like or something, like OK?


Rolls eyes.

Picked up my Bean...moved like a distracted slug..again. Met D at work. We had to install a new car seat for Bean...in minus twenty degree weather. Now I've never installed a car seat before let alone in freezing Alaska cold. D had a lot of work to catch up on..so the other nurse (in charge of safety) and I did it. I wanted to spew off about a hundred curse words. Those darn things are a frkn nightmare to a.) take out and b.) put in. Geeze freaking louise.


Picked up art supplies.


Bean falls asleep in the car.


Jill lets her sleep...


"Made"....dinner. 


We also made homemade play dough that came from school. We did some painting. We learned some sight words. We played memory. The dog swallowed and regurgitated a piece of string. Jill washed said string because said four year old wanted said string. (Gross)


Parents were finally home. I crawled to my room at about 8:50 pm. It's been an extremely long day. I'm extrememly tired. I have a massively gross cold. I also ate about 3 times the serving size for cookies. I justified it by a.) knowing that they are vegan/eco conscious and b.) I'm sick. 


OK super long day and another one tomorrow. JOY!